(A Woman’s Guide To Reclaiming Wholeness After Sexual Abuse)
Blog and Podcast Show notes
By Simone N
For a more in depth discussion, check out the podcast episode for this blog, to listen.
Are you a worry-wart? Are you anxious about everything the future may hold?
What does it accomplish?
How can we have a more peaceful approach to life?
Anxiety ad worry is something that I have struggled with, so if you also struggle with this as well, you are not alone.
Anxiety, is to be in a state of apprehension and worry, nervousness about an upcoming event, of an uncertain outcome.
Worry, is to feel anxiety or unease; to also dwell on current problems and difficulties.
You can see why I put these two together. They are one of the same; they produce the same problem within us. However, the distinction between the two, is that anxiety is future based, worry can be also create uncomfortable feelings of anxiety (future based), but can, as well, create the unease based in present circumstances.
Chronic anxiety, can be a medical disorder (generalized anxiety disorder). It is causes anxiety/panic attacks (increased heart rate, and breathing, sweating, trembling). Some anxiety disorders are specified to a particular phobia (flying, bugs, closed spaces).
Although, what I am speaking about is anxiety, in general. Anxiety and worry is a habit or pattern that can hinder your life; goals, plans, etc. It can disturb your peace, eliminates the possibility of happiness (consistently running tape if worry, doom, dread), you cannot think clearly and effectively. Your body will suffer too (muscle tension, heart palpitation as a result of the fight or flight mode);eventually having negative effect on your health if prolonged.
The thing that makes anxiety and worry a problem, is that it is a waste of time. What I mean is, it is irrational (fear-based). What you are worried about (the trouble you think you are in, or anticipating), far exceeds anything that can happen. Even what we feared came true, is it really as bad as you imagined it, and whose to say that it didn’t happen that way ultimately for your good?
To worry and have anxiety, I believe, is to way for our egos to feel in control of an uncertain outcome. This may not seem to make sense at first, but follow me with this. The ego doesn’t like not being in control (future is not foreseeable, or predictable). The ego in it’s function, must exert some kind of control; this is where the anxiety/comes in. If it were to surrender, then the ego would have no control, no use (dissolves in the moment), so it desperately fights this at all costs.
So how do we relieve anxiety and worry? Here are a few tips, and reminders:
- Be present. Meditation (I explained the importance of this in another article), or deep-breathing, brings us into the present moment. The ego hates this, because it has no power in it. The reason why being in the present works so well is, when we are present we are not thinking past (guilt, regret, shame, trauma) or future (anxiety, worry dread, apprehension) which is where the pain comes from. When you are present, you no longer feel anxious, or worried, because you are here, not thinking of the future.
- Soothe yourself. As you master the skill of staying present (it takes practice), finding a way to bring yourself down from the agitated, nervous, and running-of -the- mill thought patterns that anxiety and worry brings, is so helpful. Using positive affirmations (state your okay-ness of the moment, and how you want a certain a circumstance, and situation to turn out); music(elevates mood, releases endorphins), especially with positive messages, and/or soothing sound to induce relaxation.
- Talk to someone about your worries (make sure it is a trusted loved one). Sometimes it helps to get a different perspective, opinion, or solution to a certain predicament or problem. It can help you to feel lighter; particularly, when knowing that someone cares enough to listen to your problems, and empathize enough to help you solve it.
- Ask yourself what is the worst that can happen, if the thing you feared came to realization. Would you survive? Would it be nearly as bad as you think is could be? Sometimes, all it takes is a change in perception, that makes the shift from anxiety to peace. If the “worst” does happen, it is meant to. Lessons need to be learned. Perhaps you have done something you knew would create a certain outcome you don’t want (but did it anyway, therefore the worry is warranted); what is the lesson in that? Do you need to listen, honor, and follow your instincts/intuition more? Be more responsible? No matter what happens, and how it manifests, all is well.
- Trust the Higher Power/God/Universe is in control. You are protected, loved, and everything is working together for your good. Fear is the root of anxiety and worry, therefore love is the antidote. God/Higher Power/ Source is love. Hold on to that.
- Life is too short. Time is passing you by as you worry. You are missing precious moments with loved ones (friends and family); the laughter, and the beauty surrounding every one of us.
Those are a few reasons why you shouldn’t worry and have anxiety, hopefully it was helpful. I know, it can be a struggle, but over time, you will learn that there is nothing to fear.
Next article: How To Overcome: Doubt and Confusion